(TRACW)
by Zanzibar Jones
Yo.
This is a series for all you people out there who think a children's series about the Clone Wars is a fucking travesty. The Clone Wars are basically space world war II, a holocaust of suffering and galactic bloodshed. This is not stuff for kids. There shouldn't be a baby Jedi hanging out with Anakin. Hell is not for children in Star Wars.
So, here you go. I'm storyboarding a new Clone Wars series that will run on HBO or Showtime. George Lucas has already offered me 10 million to begin pre-production. Woops, was I not supposed to put that on the Internet, George?
EPISODE II.2 - "WAR DAWN"
THEMESONG: "Walking With Strangers" by The Birthday Massacre
Fade in.
GENERAL KENOBI rides through a sterile industrial hell world in a lone REPUBLIC GUNSHIP, which flies dangerously low and fast.
MISSILE CLONE: General Kenobi, we're outnumbered. We need to go back to the transport!
KENOBI: You cowardly genetic hamburger. Just do what I tell you.
MISSILE CLONE: Yes, sir!
KENOBI frowns. The clones are too eager to obey his every order unquestioningly. They look human, but are not. The Force tells him so.
A BLUE CLONE suddenly slides into the GUNSHIP's open side door.
SERGEANT CLONE: Hey! You're not in this outfit--!
BLUE CLONE: Shut up. I outrank everyone here but the Jedi.
KENOBI (unimpressed): And just who are you?
BLUE CLONE: I'm Rex. Captain Rex to you... Jedi.
CONTINUED IN PART II...
1 comment:
"Hell is not for children in Star Wars."
Pat Benatar disagrees.
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